*Encounter With An Entitled Teenager*

“It is your right as a child to wear a T-shirt, a pair of trousers and a pair of shoes…your parents owe you that because you can’t be moving about naked and without shoes. But it is a privilege if that T-shirt, pair of trousers and shoes is by Gucci or Giorgio Armani. It is self-entitlement and gross stupidity, if you refuse to wear clothes or shoes your parents bought for you with their hard-earned money because it is not Tommy Hilfiger or Calvin Klein.”

Those were my parting shots as we ended the day.

It didn’t look like a happy ending, if you ask me. But it sure was a sober moment, that gave my young man so much to ponder on and rethink his journey as an entitled kid and where such journey would likely end up if he refuses to apply the brakes and do a U-turn.

Interestingly, the day began on an exciting note. We were meant to go out for lunch at a popular restaurant on Isaac John, GRA, Ikeja and have a few words over a good meal. But the lunch was only part of a game plan, all worked out and kept under wrap.

“Sir, you still haven’t told me where we are going, I need to know now!” the young man demanded after pestering me for over an hour. His mother had complained to me about his entitled, near narcissistic behaviour and needed help to straighten him up.

“I hope you know that you and your husband created this boy?” I said to her, just to get her to accept responsibility for her role in the making of this entitled boy.

“Entitled kids are not born; they’re made” I said, “and most times those who made them don’t always accept responsibility for their creation.”

Aside getting this distraught mom to accept responsibility for this problem, while we figure out how to ‘solve’ it, I also had to express my concern, which is :would this boy return to “factory setting” after I’m done working with him, especially since we haven’t really dealt with the attitudes that created him in the first place? Who is going to sustain the gains of this process when it’s finally over?

These were the concerns I was pondering on and trying to figure out when the boy’s consistent pestering brought me back to reality.

“Sir, where are we going ooo?” he asked, hitting the dashboard vehemently.

By this time, I had driven into the street, and we were less than two minutes away from where I was taking him to, and I knew it was already too late to turn back, so I decided to let the cat out of the bag.

“What would you say to a dying teenager if you met one?” I asked, as I engaged the hand brake while the engine was still running.

The boy stared at me, turned around, not sure whether that question was for him or for someone else in the car. He stared at me again, wondering as he stuttered inaudibly, “a dying teenager?”

“Yes!” I affirmed.

“We are here to see a teenager who is undergoing treatment for a terminal disease. The mom called me this week and from her discussions with the doctors, she has very little time left…so can you come with me to pray with her and have a few words with her?”

The boy’s brain apparently, couldn’t process that. Somehow, he managed to get himself out of the car, and we headed for the reception. He kept mum as we walked into the ward the young lady was being attended to.

For many adults, visiting or talking to a dying person is uncomfortable, let alone a teenager. That feeling of looking at someone you know would be gone in three week is hard to deal with. But it could be all that an entitled teenager needs to wake up, take the attention off himself for once, and think of other people on his way to adopting a life of gratitude and appreciation for little things.

“Boy, anyone who is confused about the difference between “what’s deserved”, “what’s earned” and “what’s a gift” is still in diapers and needs to grow up quickly. That’s why we came to this hospital, and I need you to see today as the first day of the next phase of your life,” I said to him as we made to leave the hospital.

The lunch never held, actually, and he didn’t say any word about it or anything else to me, from the time we left the hospital till his mom came to pick him.

Excerpts from my forthcoming book, #LetterToMyFutureSonLaw

We’ll be helping your teenager understand the mystery of LIFE, while demystifying PURPOSE and LEADERSHIP at this year’s *Teens Leadership Summit(TLS)*.

Every child is born to make a dent in the clouds by becoming the person they were created to be. Let this critical journey begin for your teenager at this year’s Teens Leadership Summit.

Venue is :Opebi, Lagos,

Date : August 18-20,2021. 9am to 2pm daily.

To register or for more details, email contactme@iamkingsley.com.ng